Those of who know me well know I have a penchant for doing things the unconventional way. These includes dating guys who are not the same race as I am. Race is a touchy topic. and I don't want to go to jail for blogging about it. But I feel the need to air my views over this particular group of people.

Shannen's right. Well, everyone's right, for that matter. These people live really screwed up lives. Sometimes I try to see it in their point of view. But I find it so difficult to feel sympathy for them. The ex belonged to this group as well. Having been around these people for quite some time, I caught a glimpse into their troubled world. Let's not talk about vices like smoking and clubbing. because this is apparent in most of the different social groups.(you know what i mean). But I have to say that their mentality and perspectives are all super screwd up as well. Of course not all are like that. I refuse to think that. But its undeniable that it is rare to find someone who lives a normal life amidst all the chaos drummed up by their similar counterparts.

One thing that is shockingly common place amongst these people, is their inability to maintain serious relationships. I'm not saying this just because of what happened with the jerk. I'm looking at this issue with an open mind. But the wider I keep my eyes and mind open, the more ugly things I discover about these people. I can laugh and just remark: 'what is this man! game ar? very fun meh? get one and throw another one. They don't know what's the meaning of aids meh? they think only sleep with prostitutes then will get aids is it?' Its amusing when you're an outsider just looking in through a glass screen. But when you have actually stepped into this crazy world with one foot in, you can't help but shake your head and wish you could do something about it. Of course I'm not intending to be a martyl and sacrifice myself to save these rotting souls. But I do wish I can find someone in this social circle who is sincere and normal.

Another issue that makes one crinch is their apparent lackadasical attitude to all things in life. When I say all, it really means ALL. Its so totally mind boggling how they're able to just party without a care in the world, burn their books, and literally just live like there's no tomorrow. I'm aware this makes them the most exciting, thrilling, fun and intriguing people to hang out with. After all, this is what attracted me to him in the first place. But don't they ever think about anything else besides money party and sex? The future to them really literally means 'FUTURE'. far far away. isn't it amusing?

Despite all these, I shall continue on my quest to find one who is most right out of all the wrong (Maximin decision making. jeanie and meanie should find this term familiar.) But I'll be really careful this time after going through all the shit.

suck it up and soldier on aileen!

p.s. I don't care if you're gonna scold me stupid. and refuse to lend me your shoulders when I come crying. But I'm just the weird person that I am. take it or leave it