Its not that I can't stand up for myself. Of course I can! I'm good at ranting and screaming and making huge scenes. I got it from my mama. Just that, only a select few sees this side of me. I know how to swear like there's no tomorrow and I definitely know how to holla at someone till their ears turn deaf. But I choose not to. Because, that's not the way an educated person should behave. Someone who is sensible would know when to shut their gap and when enough is enough.

I'm not like your many other girlfriends who will f*** you upside down at the slightest error commited. its because the girls you dated before were immature little brats. Not me.So why should I change the way I deal with my own emotions, just for you? You want me to scream at you just to make yourself feel less guilty. see? that's selfish behaviour.

Like I said, I hate myself for using silence as a barricade against you. because you deserve a severe beating up. But that's my automatic defense mechanism. I clam up when things happen. I just want to retreat and think of the best way to resolve the issue. The screaming and ranting will only come when I've straightened out my thoughts. which may take a day or two, depending on the situation. So you see? its not that I can't stand up for myself. I just deal with things differently.

You don't want to change ur vices for me. So why should I? especially if its just to make you feel better?

I'm not actually very nice. Its just that I haven revealed the ugly side of me, to you yet. I can't wait to see your reaction when one day I decide to unleash all my fury on you. Don't say I didn't warn you.